When Life Gives You Lemons

Trying to make the most out of infertility, and life in general. This is my journey to conceive, after a miscarriage and D&C that left me with Asherman's Syndrome.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Mortifying experience at the RE's

Today I went in for my IUI. I get called into the room, and the RE walks in and it’s this young guy I've never seen at RE office before. He holds up B's "sample" and has me ok all the info. Then he says, “Did your husband grow up in [suburb of NYC]?” I said “yes” and he said..."oh, I grew up with him. He's a really nice guy." I am mortified. Here I am in this vulnerable state with my hoohah on display for all to see, and the guy who is doing my IUI has known B since about the age of 4. They weren’t good friends but were friendly when they were younger. I am beyond mortified. This guy now knows the intimate details of me better than B does! So he's making small talk --asking me how B and I met and I said through another hometown friend of theirs, etc., but the whole time I'm thinking...please stop talking to me. Then he said “B's a really great guy, but you married him so probably already know that.” I am so weirded out. Mortified. Embarrassed. Humiliated. Have I mentioned mortified. The least I could’ve done was gotten a bikini wax or even shaved - much neglected on my part due to lack of time. I told B about this encounter and he was like I can't show my face around there anymore! He thinks it’s weirder for him, since he knows this guy but I’d say it was pretty weird for me too. I’ll bet this RE went home to his wife and told him about the encounter and is thinking well at least my wife gets herself waxed. I’m a mess down there and I was putting off getting my bikini wax for another 2 weeks – when we have plans to go out of town to Chicago for a vacation (and to celebrate our third anniversary). There’s nothing more humiliating than having your husband’s childhood friend stick a speculum in you and then insert your husband’s sperm directly into your uterus, especially when you didn’t primp for the occasion.

Anyway, my lining was the best it’s been so far – a whopping 8.5 mm yesterday, on cycle day 16. I don’t know if it’s the acupuncture, the CoQ10, the baby aspirin, the Chinese herbs, the red raspberry tea, the clear HSG, the longer cycle since it’s natural and not Clomid-induced, the drinking a glass of wine a day this past week, the daily rain dance I do hoping that this is it or all these forces combined that attributed to my thickened lining this cycle but whatever it is, I’ll take it! I’m feeling uplifted. I hope this IUI works of course, since we’re doing the baby dance thing on our own also, but if it doesn’t work I’m hoping that my period will at least be nice and red and heavy flow-y due to the good lining. Staying positive…


  • At 2:12 PM, Blogger Heather said…

    Congrats on the nice lining!

    I know that I would be mortified too - but I have to admit that you made me chuckle. Just think of the story you get to tell your kids! (feel free to slap me)

  • At 9:28 PM, Blogger soralis said…

    Omg I would have been mortified too!

    Good luck and hope you don't have to see that RE again!

    Take care

  • At 11:08 AM, Blogger Hope548 said…

    It does sound mortifying, but honestly, think of how many women he sees in one day. He's got to be able to block all of that out, and probably didn't think a second thing about it. Don't worry about it! Do you normally have a thin lining? I've always had trouble with that as well! I hope this IUI is successful for you!

  • At 11:23 AM, Blogger VanillaDreams said…

    Ooh, that would be kind of mortifying, wouldn't it?!? I wonder what would have happened if your husband had been with you? Would the RE still have been so chatty while he did his work?!?! I would imagine it would be even more strange to know the husband, chat with him, while doing a procedure on the wife?!!?

    Do you normally have lining problems?

    Mine usually is anywhere from 8mm to 9.5 mm, BUT for the very first time I got to a 10 mm lining with this current FET -- so that was very exciting for me!

    I didn't do anything different this time (I take Delestrogen injections) except that I added 2 mg of Estrace tablets vaginally about four or five nights. So, maybe that is what "boosted" the lining.

    Well, good luck on this cycle!

    All the best,

  • At 11:31 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    hmmmm... I'm thinking the RE should have kept that "Look what we have in common!" information to himself. But I know he meant no harm. If he went home and told his wife she probably thought, "My god that woman must have been mortified!"

    Best of luck! I had an IUI last Wednesday. The waiting is killing me!


  • At 1:38 PM, Blogger Pam said…

    Delurking to wish you luck with this IUI.

  • At 2:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Uggh, that is mortifying. I think he must have some sort of confidentiality clause to ensure that he doesn't share this info with anyone but his spouse, right? And don't worry, I think we all have hairy hoohahs most of the time. The one time I went to my GYN with a Brazilian (two days before the wedding), his face turned bright red.

    My fingers (and toes, and all of my limbs for that matter) are crossed for you and B! If you conceive, that baby (babies ;-) ) could have my b'day or S's!


  • At 4:06 PM, Anonymous annmarie said…

    Nice lining! Seems like any one of those things could have contributed...but OH MY GOD about the RE. Don't dwell on it. He won't know what's what at the end of the day, wax or no wax. But I understand you...who needs to hear that!?

  • At 5:10 PM, Blogger Kris said…

    How embarassing about your RE! But, hell yeah for that lining! Glad you are feeling so up about this IUI.

  • At 6:38 AM, Blogger Zee said…

    Oh my God! That's one of my worst nightmares! (But it's a funny story to tell -- in the right company, I mean.) But congrats on the fabulous lining. I hope this two-week wait is brief and fruitful!

  • At 8:27 AM, Blogger Sarah said…

    Oh my gosh that's crazy. He should have waited until after the appointment to say that. How was the IUI? We're starting in 2 months and I'm really anxious.

  • At 11:49 AM, Anonymous Jennie said…

    Congrats on the good lining number. Hoping the best for you from this cycle.

    I'm sure that when your B and his friend were 4 that neither of them ever expected that he would be holding a container of your husband's sample! I had a similar embarassing experience that I just blogged about yesterday, so I empathize with you.

  • At 12:14 AM, Blogger Thalia said…

    What a weird experience. Although the one thing I would let go of is the waxing thing. I'm sure he sees enough cooters in different stages of undress that he doesn't even notice - and of course it's none of his business what you do with yours in beautification terms anyway!


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